5 things I learnt while being a Sex Worker.
Jun 01, 2022
5 really important things I learnt about pleasure, embodiment and of course sex, whilst being a full time Sex Worker.
- Sex is better when the other person is into it, like really into it.
And what I’m referring to here is the authentic pleasure experience that is unbridled, uninhibited and fully expressed. Not shrouded in self judgement, Critism and body image issues that is keeping you disconnected from fully enjoying yourself and your lover.
Now this can look different on many fronts. Ie, estatic sex can be rather quiet. Fully expressed does not mean super loud and performative. It means giving yourself the permission, thus granting the other permission, to be fully IN the pleasure experience, how ever that looks.
- The more my client was ‘up in their head’ I would notice I would get ‘up in my head’ too. and vise versa.
If one partner is up in their head, so too is the other. It doesn’t matter which is which and who is who. When...
HER SEX LIFE WAS HOPELESS
Jun 01, 2022
“I don’t want to shag my hubby anymore. Heck, I don’t even want to shag me.”
This is one of the top 5 reasons women come to see me.
They can’t get out of their mind. They are stuck in their head. And they’re caught up in the loop of incessant bombarding thoughts.
Mind distractions.To do lists.Challenges to find solutions for.Schedules, appointments, finances.Kids.Mothering.Work, partner. Socials…Gosh, does it end?
They’re stressed AF. Snowed under. Feeling like they’re just surviving. They’re slaving away at their ‘To Do List’. Stuck, stagnant and feeling shitty.
It’s fucking relentless. And they are at FULL CAPACITY. No wonder desire and sex are the first thing off the table.
But what they truly craves is:
Solitude
SleepSnugglesSoftnessTendernessBeing taken care ofWhispersCaressesCalmInner PeacePLEASE
So I...
JUST BE IN THE SHOWER
Jun 01, 2022
It is your mind that is busy, not your body.
Your conscious body can really only do 2 to 3 things at once and be in one place at once. Your mind however, well, it can do a thousand things at once, have a gazillion conversations at once, be in a bunch of places at once. It is the only thing known to human that can be both in the past, and in the future, and occasionally in the present, all at once.
So when you say you are busy. What you’re really saying is my mind is so full of thoughts and scenarios. When you realise that your physical being actually isn't that busy, you can start to become present and find pleasure in the ACTUAL thing your body is doing.
Like taking a shower. You can’t physically be having a shower, driving your kids to school, doing the groceries and making those phone calls at work, all at once. But your mind, sure as shit, can. By allowing your mind to hijack yourself in this way is such a huge disservice. Your mind is...
ESCAVATING THE UNSEEN
Jun 01, 2022
Me: 'I let myself down'.
Also Me: 'And I'm picking myself up. SO RISE BIATCH. I LOVE YOU!'.
oooFH! I've been sitting with, feeling, observing, listening and seeing a lot. It's icky feelings 'doing the work'.
I did my practice this morning after honouring my descent over the last couple of days.
I wrote down all the shitty thoughts. I got them onto paper, out from running loops in my head.
I felt. I moved. I pleasured. I transmuted. I let go. I played. I laughed.
Then, I took inventory again.
After every shitty word I thought about myself, to myself, I revisited and wrote a different narrative.
And when I got to:
"I let myself down"
I re-wrote: "And I'm picking myself up. Rise Biatch, I love you!"
See. The thing is this. When I'm going down. I'm going down to mine. To excavate the shit that has buried itself within me.
I track where my feelings and thoughts take me. I observe. I allow. and it is the...
GIVING UP
Jun 01, 2022
Some times, Some days
I just give it all up.
I take off the burden of creating, formulating, mapping.
I put down the resistance when it feels like I’m bumping up on a brick wall.
Inspiration hasn’t left me. It just cant get through to me is all.
I have the headphones of life on.
As if it was a mime, inspiration flaps its arms around trying to have me take notice.
But I don’t know what it’s trying to say.
My ears are full of noise, it’s the thoughts I play in my head.
I feel the constriction in my body.
As soon as I feel my body. I remember.
I remember I don’t want to feel like this.
I remember I have a choice.
And I choose to give up.
I give up the thoughts. I give up learning. I give up absorbing and taking in all the information. I give up wondering how I’m going to do this or how I’m going to do that. What the ‘right, best’ way is.
...
ACCIDENTAL EMBODIMENT
Jun 01, 2022
Anxiety feels like a disturbed ants nest in my chest.
Times like these I reach for peace. Not for pleasure.
To lull the ants back into their home for rest.
I have to actively bring calm to my being. I really have to focus.
I remember the first time I unknowingly calmed.
Out of sheer desperation, sheer salvation.
I was saturated in overwhelm. Drowning in debt and in shame. I was trying to keep my mouth above water.
Whilst simultaneously, trying to rescue another from himself.
Sitting in my office chair of my sensuality boutique, I had to close my eyes and really focus.
I followed my breath all the way down to my feet and twinkled my toes.
I just had to get present.
Like minute to minute fucking present.
I had to get so clear of where I was, where my feet where, what I was touching, what I could physically feel, in that very moment and know that I was safe. Physically safe.
“Breath in, breath out” I would...
Feelin Myself
Jun 01, 2022
Me: Hunny, what do you think I should wear today?
Him: Something sexy hunny, that always helps you to get inspired.
Me: So a wrap dress with no underwear?
Him: Exactly
Me: I love it, that feels good.
…..
I love that he knows how I chanel my creativity and he supports & encourages that so effortlessly.
I love that even after our s’xy shower adventure, we continue to weave our intimate connectivity and erotic expression amongst the everyday things. I love this about us.
I love that I now get to go and be in erotc ritual and receive creative guidance by accessing my pleasure, moving my body and being me. I love to nourish myself in this way.
I love that both my man and my self are so orgasmiclly fulfilled & loved up that from here, we are in overflow. I image it would feel like dancing on clouds.
I love that I get to guide women to access THIS for themselves. I love seeing the joy & juiciness land in their body....
JEALOUSY, Jealousy
Jun 01, 2022
JEALOUSY, Jealousy
Knocks on my door.
Jealousy, Jealousy
Called me a wh*re.
To which I say:
Jealousy Jealousy,
You’re being a bore.
Jealousy jealousy,
You are actually the wh*re.
You called me a wh*re
But there is always much more
Let’s see what’s there
when I knock on your door
Ah, you find my sensual liberation
distasteful in its freedom of expression
You have shut down your own situation
Is your desire for self permission, your confession?
Oh, Jealousy Jealousy
I have what you need
Follow me, we’ll plant the seeds.
It’s a little internal exploration
Now dive on in Jealousy Jealousy
Your well runs deep
Within you, you have all the colours you seek
Trust yourself Jealousy, you’re in for a treat.
SO Jealousy Jealousy
Yes, You are a bore,
And Jealousy Jealousy
You are also the wh*re.
Because Jealousy Jealousy
We are it All.
---
Jealousy is a wiry, sexy green...
THERE IS A FIGHT IN ME!
Jun 01, 2022
This burning of ambition to support, nurture, hold the hand of and take care of the mother.
TO Awaken, Ignite, Reclaim… Her Pleasure.
Her Radiance. Her Juiciness for life.
Her Eros!
This energy, I feel it rising, steaming.
It’s a PLEASURE CRUSADE
To burn down the old way of burn out, exhaustion, doing it alone, depleted and deflated.
Not on my watch! Not in my care!
Bring me your wood log for the fire…
Branded upon it your miseries.
I want to hear your voice. I want to learn your thoughts, your feelings.
I want to hear the why’s of it all. Why you don’t have time, why you don’t have support, why you feel so stuck in your life, why you don’t have pleasure playing a staring role.
Let it pour out.
Pour it out until your cup is empty of all the reason, all the frustration, anger, hurt, the betrayal, the unfairness of it...
YOU ARE YOUR EXPERIENCE
Jun 01, 2022
As the mist of my orgasm lifted and I landed back into my reality from the cosmos, I received the words “YOU ARE YOUR EXPERIENCE”.
It was the previous night’s gentle, rhythmically slow lovemaking that had me so inspired to fuel my own flames of radiance and juiciness, whilst my man was out mowing our lawn.
He walked in from putting all his tools away.
“Hunny, what’s happened here? You’re glowing!”
Was it the way my sheer goddess dress wrapped around my breasts and body?
The way my hair was tassled and glissening from the residue of the elixir I had massaged onto my yoni?
Was it my beaming smile or how I lounged in my office chair, as if I was floating on a lily pad?
No.
It was that I was radiant. I was juicy.
It was that I appeared ravishingly delicious.
It was my vibe.
I had filled my self up with orgasmic bliss, which gives the side effect of...
Author
Allonie Morris
Somatic Sexologist
Allonie Morris is a passionate Somatic Sexologist, Tantric Practitioner, creatress of Temple Venus and host of The Sexy, Sacred & Juicy Woman Podcast. Allonie is also a riveting speaker of eroticism and sexuality, workshop facilitator and a specialist in Erotic Embodiment.
